If you continue to just look over your shoulder there are two outcomes: either your neck is going to cramp up from this unnatural position or you’re going to crash into something while trying to move forward because you were to busy rummaging through what is gone to see what is in front of you.
Yes, there were things, people, events, knowledge and emotions that shaped you, but what you needed to take with you is already here. That particular set of circumstances is nonexistent now. If it served to (in)form you in any way, be it through pain or joy, it deserves respect and to be honored as stepping stone, but not a place you live in forever, while everything else is moving and changing. Those things as they were have passed, and those in the future are not yet here and their unfolding is uncertain and unclear because there are too many variables for you to ever be completely sure. There is a factor of accident and (good or bad) luck involved no matter how through your plan is.
So be here, now, in this moment, in this day – where you serve as a complete you, not telescoped back and forth and distorted by the distances of past or future lenses. You’re already full and complete and are only the space for these stories, feelings and desires to appear in, you are not those things but an infinite potentiality of all things, free to observe and interpret. Thoughts are not stronger than this space that is you. They are just thoughts and gain strength to mark and entangle you in there web only if you let them. They are transitory things, ephemeral non objects marked by the strongest emotional impressions and strengthening of the neural pathways if you visit them often. If you were not enough that one time it doesn’t mean this is you now, if it worked out marvelously that other time it doesn’t mean you can coast in the eternal now just on that self-serving accolade. It might seem something is eternal while you’re going through it, like you’ll forever feel this or be in that situation, but step a few steps back – how many things showed up and left that you thought were your eternal? And none of them was you, even if it feels you died a thousand times with the things that left, you’re still complete.
The core of you is intact because it already knows what the rational mind has no words to explain no matter how potent the reality seems at one single point. If a fire burns on a cinema screen, the screen is left unburnt no matter how real it seemed. You’re the screen, not the things that are consumed by the fire, nor the fire itself. You are boundless, unlimited, opened and free, unchangeable in the eternal change. You’re not a place, an event, a moment, an emotion, a single story or it’s interpretation. As you change and mature the stories will change with you – you have them, not the other way around.