Oh the micromanager in us all that would so love to hold it all together, the need and deep yearning to glue all of the unglued things around you that a little common sense, kindness, dedication and proper handling could fix. But who are we to say what is proper as a general rule. Forgetting this tiny detail, while having only our own solipsistic experience to measure the world by, is how tyrannies, sadism and dictatorships (and some religious or spiritual movements or cults) begin – presuming that one way is the only true and right way and that all others are wrong. Hubris is the downfall of the tyrant as it is of the micromanager while humility sets you free. It is not belittling your opinion, experience and solutions, but accepting that they are not to be imposed on those who see or choose some other way towards their goal.

The beauty and the curse of humanity is that all of us have a piece of the truth, and all of us have blind spots. The full picture reveals itself (if it ever does) only when the puzzle is put together. So I remind myself:

  • Thinking something does not make it necessarily true (for others)
  • You cannot control the way others see the world, you or life; you’re not responsible for advice they choose to take or not to take and the decisions they make
  • You have no right to tell others how to feel about things, they are free to go through this experience of their own accord; offer help and support but don’t get mad or frustrated if they are rejected, offer it again if needed, never stop offering
  • Not every single little thing around you deserves your attention, there are things that do that you’re not paying attention to and that are under your control, open your eyes and put in some work
  • Some things are not yours to control, stop forcing it, release, relax, let go, let it come if it will, course correct if it doesn’t
  • Resist the urge to take over if there is someone who knows better at hand, ask for advice, don’t let ego get its way on the expense of a real solution
  • Stop seeking validation by trying to handle everything constantly, stop filling your time with busy because what sits inside if you just go still and silent is daunting
  • Have a sense of urgency to get your life in order and fix what can be fixed but don’t rush it and realize most things are not urgent and the world will not stop spinning if it is not solved immediately
  • Trust the team and people you’ve surrounded yourself with that they will do what needs to be done without constant hovering; delegate
  • You don’t know everything
  • Neither does anyone else, but you can sure as hell learn from anyone